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Showing posts from 2020

Am I valid? An overview on reflections on self image and internet culture.

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  Valid What is valid? That is the question am I valid? I don't feel valid. I get so many constant validations, but there is a little seed of doubt that refuses to believe. This is commonly known as imposter syndrome. I think I have felt this because of an almost constant sense of alienation: I knew I was different. People who know me in real life or more personal if still on the internet only, tell me that I am beautiful, attractive, and yet I cannot shake the anxiety of authenticity. Among trans spaces, this is at best ironically and at worst pejoratively called The Hugbox and it is very bad for a lot of reasons, not only because of its origins from ableism against autistic people, but implies that affirmations are fake, and the truth is negative. One is receptive to such an attitude when they believe that the truth hurts– it can hurt, sometimes, but truth can be healing, positive, and affirming, and lies can be negative and hurtful. The Hug-box sounds good, I mean, who w

Nonsense poetry: September 2020 (17+)

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Poems by Brittany Tw//Cw: reclaimed homophobic slurs, sexual themes, swears, and drug references.    The Ballad of Pathology: Queering therapy Pansexuals take pot Bisexuals take bikes Lesbians take dykes Gay men take bots Asexuals take the cake Aromantics take the bow These are my people I wish I were queer So I can fuck your butt I need to get laid ASAP Because my therapist never loved me at all Parasocial delusions Will be the death of me and you all! The Lady's Prayer Goddess of the Moon, Goddess of the Void Please forgive me For I have not sinned Let me be not forsaken Let me be a dark evil A blight, on this planet  Pray for me Saint Sappho  For I want a woman– To be in my life, forever And also, let me be one, For I am a girl of beauty. Bless this pink pill of E Bless my breasts and butt Let it grow to be beloved.  The Sanctuary: Body Sacredness My body is a temple What does it resemble? To these parts I assemble Will become a win of a gamble I will grow to all of my goals I w

Yearning in these trying times: a poem.

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  A poem by Brittany Diana Yearning Imagine wanting something, or rather someone you love and cherish so much Do shoppers and lovers dream of quarantine memes? Once in the near reaches of Pennsylvania, in the dying monuments of consumerism, There was I, and my soulmate, and my other girlfriends, going to see what we miss. First, we were on an adventure, through the side suburban streets and country roads. All the signs lead to the malls, shops, and stores, you must buy, sell, and do business. We then take some things– games, food, products, and services, but why do we all pay? It is soulless– we find our soul in the soulless condition, lest our mind and bones decay.   Become a unicorn patron today!

Writer's Commentary on my Feminist Essay from College.

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  Hello everyone, this is Brittany, the writer behind BDUnicorn. I remembered I had written an essay on a final essay I had written on feminist views of transgender issues and I had argued that the correct position was that feminists should include trans people, especially trans women and transfeminine non-binary people like myself. That's the synopsis of the essay. I had written it originally in the months of April and May in the year 2019. So it's over a year since I had turned it in to a philosophy professor who taught me as the course's final exam. Here is the link to it This blog will be my commentary on it. The essay has a dry, even stale, yet factual set up and introduction. I demonstrate knowledge by specifically comparing TERFs and other radical feminists, especially feminists that are pro-trans and include trans women in their feminism, rather than exclude. One thing I did, which I may not have done in hindsight, as use autogynephilia as a touchstone for m

Short Poem: The self-esteem of a lady

She was the darling of the divine, she was the belle of the ball She was said to be the most beautiful person in the universe Yet this feminine person did not see herself as beautiful at all -Brittany Diana Become a patron to support this blog

Ode to depression (poem)

I am dull, I am numb, I am only a person that will stare I feel null, and it was something that is no longer there I see that nothing is my life, I see the gray skies above I hear the soft buzzing noises of the white lights above The senses are dull, the senses have numbed, for I am null The self is yearning for pleasure that heals the soul. The boredom reigns sovereign supreme above all The joy and merriment of my life is fleeting, for I am null. Where is the joy and how does one live life to pleasure? Who is my significant other, who will be my treasure? When will my life improve, will there be something? What will come next, what shall we do today, nothing? -Brittany Become a patron today!

Poem: What is order, what is chaos?

What is order, what is chaos?  Through order, there is chaos; through chaos, there is order. For if you enforce the order upon the nature of our universe    It will be as if you have stricken the sea with a metal mallet. You will only have made splashes against the sand and air And when you let the sea flow in its chaotic order of discordance A symphony and orgy of waves and storms that turn to stillness You will see the eye of the storm and be amazed to see its bliss If beauty is in the eye of the beholder, then this eye beholds you–  In all of its cosmic discordant harmony, that is the sea, air, land. The mountains stand tall, but are themselves slippery but slow. The order from chaos is both the sublime and the most beautiful. -Brittany Diana. Support this blog!

Autism and Gender: Where divergences meet

CW/TW gender dysphoria, functioning labels, ableism, stereotypes, sexism. Hello everyone. It is still Autism acceptance month and will be my last entry for that month. In this blog, I will discuss these the findings from the articles and then give my personal opinions connecting both of my personal and anecdotal experiences as ways to ignite a conversation about both transgender and autistic people. I want to explore why some people are both autistic and transgender. I myself am both. In my previous blog about autism fashion, I stated that I was diagnosed at age 4 with the outdated diagnosis label of Asperger's Syndrome. Instead, I call my condition autism, coming from the current standards of diagnosis. Autism spectrum disorder and being transgender are two different things, though they are misunderstood, they have seen massively more awareness and even some acceptance, albeit to lesser degrees. However, being trans is not a mental disorder. The only thing in the DSM-V

Autism Chic: An autistic person's style and view on fashion.

Hello everyone, today we are going to have a conversation on what I call autism chic. It is Autism Month, April. And this day, April 2nd is Autism Awareness Day. If you do not know, your dear writer, Brittany, is autistic. Now you are aware. I want to start my series of various autism blogs with fashion. Now, you're probably what the hell do fashion and autism have to do with each other? Autism is a complex spectrum of various mental states and abilities. I have it. I was diagnosed with Autism, specifically Asperger's Syndrome, in 2001. I was considered "high functioning" but that's a topic for another time. Clothing must be comfortable but stylish? I do not know. Am I doing a fashion? As I said before I am very concerned and fascinated with beauty standards and fashion even though I know they have a lot of societal, systematic problems. When I try on clothes I have a few criteria: comfort, price, and style. I usually sort by style, then I try it on

Transgender visibility Day 2020

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  Hello everyone. This blog will be a quick statement on trans visibility day which is March 31st, this year it falls on a Tuesday. Transgender visibility day is one of many days of pride and awareness for the greater LGBTQIA+ communities, in particular for the trans community. I am a non-binary transfeminine person. I am trans and I knew I was for almost 3 years since 2017 but didn't start transitioning in 2018 when I had supportive friends and came out to them as well my family at home. I had a support system at home established, I then felt it was safe to be out and transition to be my true self, and I'm glad you're on This Journey™ because transformation and adventure is one big giant process I couldn't do it without you! Jokes aside. My friends were probably the reason why I am today. Some details about my transition. I have been on feminizing HRT for over a year and that's amazing. So I am glad that I am the real me and I have met wonderful people,

Blog Update: 23rd birthday and life changes

Hello everyone. Today is my birthday and I am now 23 years old. So, happy birthday to me! I will be on vacation so my writing will be delayed, but please consider my Patreon if you want to help me celebrate and keep my blog alive. Some changes from last month. I stopped doing rideshare as my job. I have other jobs lined up, I also have extended my services to ghostwriting, translation, and editing for hire. I, of course, want to make this my job, and eventually, launch a potential youtube career. I want to get all the support from any fans I have. Writing is something I love doing. I may go to grad school for a master's but not sure about that. So please consider supporting this blog through my Patreon or you can make a one-time donation at PayPal. Thanks -Brittany

Pesky Hormones: A transfeminine person's period. (Poem)

CW/TW: HRT, genitalia, periods, menstruation, reproduction . . . . . . . . . Originally posted on Patreon, February 27th, 2020 They say make baby but I don’t want to, and even if I could, I still wouldn’t want that. My transition goal isn’t motherhood The estrogens and progestins now in my body have gone mad For they are searching for my uterus that I never had What is wrong with me? What could it be?  Is this a period? Who knows? Won’t you tell me? The cramps and sudden arousal say make baby How do I know, ask my doctor at the clinic, maybe? Do I bleed? No doctor, I don’t bleed through my dick And the TERFs accuse me of pulling a misogynist trick But surely my PMS, sore breasts and cramps are real This is something that most people with estrogen feel The hormones are the cause, they change, they shift. There are new feelings that often fall and drift. My pesky hormones are not always such a curse. The breasts are nice, but they ar

View into the soul: a poem

There is something in the brain And it is rather insane Because I cannot quite describe All the hues and the general vibe. The mind produces images and pics, Which are all made of leaves and sticks Or grass, mountains, and colors of the sky In which it really feels like I can fly Over it all, in its rainbow glory It tells a wild and vibrant story The story has no words nor text  I wait to see what will come next!

An introduction to Transfeminine Sexual Health: Why is nobody talking about it?

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TW: Dysphoria, Medical Bias, Sexual Anatomy, Human reproduction. I am placing a general warning for anyone not comfortable with talks of certain body parts. If you're a trans woman or transfeminine with bottom dysphoria, this may be uncomfortable. And I will be focusing more on the United States since that is where I live, but do comment on the status of trans health care in your country, especially if you are not from the U.S. I was inspired to write this after hearing about trans men talk about their experience with gynecology and how cisnormative it is, and how medical institutions still conflate having a uterus and a vagina with being a woman, likewise they tend to the same with having a penis, prostate, testes, etc with being a man. Though a lot of doctors especially when dealing genitalia and reproductive parts are becoming more trans-inclusive. I will be using transfeminine as an umbrella term for any transgender person that was assigned male at birth that is taking es

Changing Time Back: Transgender Lost Youth and Queer Theory

Read here if display is not working. Hello everyone, my name is Brittany, and I am a non-binary trans femme. So, recently I thought of my past and what could have been. I helped my parents clean their basement and inside the aged boxes were relics of the past: my childhood, yet I felt terribly disconnected, this was one of many times I’ve reflected upon my past and youth. I intend this to be an introduction and overview of facets of the transgender experience using my own to serve as examples, but even others, from a twitter thread. Imagine what would have been for the adult identity you have and your childhood matching. No women with boyhoods and no men with girlhoods, and nonbinary people not having either. Imagine the world of difference it would make for one to transition as a child, even before puberty, and not have permanent masculinization or feminization in the wrong way. I also wish I could have been an enby girl as a child. It’s one thing for an AMAB perso